


We will always end up here

by FirenzeSun



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Anal Sex, Domestic Castiel/Dean Winchester, Fallen Castiel, M/M, Minor Character Death, Sexual Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-28
Updated: 2013-07-28
Packaged: 2017-12-21 14:35:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 20,722
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/901417
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FirenzeSun/pseuds/FirenzeSun
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Post-season 8. Cas, now whitout his Grace, went in search for Dean's help. Dean doesn't know how to help him nor how to avoid him turning into 2014!Cas and at the same time he must face the feelings that he can't hide anymore. But of course, domestic life in the Bunker isn't enough and his brother comes with a hunt. Cas' first haunt will force them to face each other. And at the end, the former angel will have to make a decision.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So this is a three arc 20k story. Arc 1 aka Chapter 1 aka Introduction aka what happened right after the end of 'Sacrifice'. Arc 2, Chapter 2 and 3, that is the hunt. And Arc 3, that was meant to be just an epilogue but it ended up with a plot. The story was meant to be just Domestic!Destiel, but suddenly I had a plot and a hunt and I just couldn't stop writing. I started with no path, after the finale that I watched the very next morning for wifi problems, I needed to write so that night I started. I have no Beta, so it's just me. English is not my native language, but I did study it for more than 12 years so... Just keep it in mind. When I started writing this I meant to explore Cas' humanity, and I had one set in mind: FEELS. I also wanted to make a Destiel fanfic where Sam was more than just the third wheel, I mean, he is in a way, but I wanted to include him. To make a Destiel fanfic that had the whole Team Free Will on it. And I think I managed it. I think being keyword here.  
> And I wrote this on my cell phone, twenty thousands words written with just my cell phone, so give me some credit.

It had been two days since he had fallen. His face was covered in little cuts that, still red, were slowing healing. He had got them in the wildness, when he had walked for hours till he reached a lonesome road. A gentle soul had taken pity on him and had carried him part of the way. In the passenger seat of the truck he had fallen asleep for the first time.

His dreams had been pledged with fire falling from the sky, the screams of his brothers and sisters piercing his skull. And fear, and impotence, and doubts and sadness. A sadness so great that hadn't let him take the much needed oxygen into his lungs.

It had been weird going to the toilet room for the first time in his now full human body. He had went once before, not even an angel can drink a liquor store or eat that many burgers without his vessel acquiring certain necessities. But even then, Dean and Sam had been there to tell him what was that burning sensation in his groin or that pressure in his butt. And even then, they hadn't been _his_ necessities, they had been his vessel's.

Having hunger had been something terrifying. Before the Apocalypse ended when he had lost his mojo his hunger had been different. Bobby and the boys had insisted on him eating, so he hadn't got to know that tearing feeling in his stomach. The truck driver had been kind enough of sharing his meal with him before departing. Castiel hadn't known why the man had been so nice to him. If he had maintained his Grace he may had known that it was because he remained him of that autistic brother that the truck driver had lost long ago, when he was young and hadn't had time to lose on his loony brother till it was too late.

The man had given Cas a few bucks to get him by, but he had had no use for them. He knew the address and once he had orientated himself he had just walked. He had walked the whole night. A few times he had felt lost and had wanted to look up at the sky to locate himself. But he couldn't look at the sky just yet, it was too painful.

He had ignored all the needs of _his_ body, and just walked. The sun was rising when he arrived at the door of the Bunker. With a hand, white from the cold, he knocked and stood there, arms just hanging at his side, his eyes looking at the door as if he was trying to see through it the movements of its inhabitants. When none came he started to get anxious. The thoughts and feelings that he had managed to hold on check were threatening to pour out of him. He knocked again, at bit harder this time, a bit more desperate.

Finally, after what seemed ages, Dean opened the door.

"Cas..." he whispered when he saw the shattered figure of the man in front of him.

Blue eyes pierced him through a veil of tears that hanged in the balance.

And the sight of the man whose image had been guiding him since he lost his Grace proved to much to him and he fell to his knees.

"Cas!" shouted Dean and rushed to kneel in front of him and grabbed him by his shoulders. "Cas, Cas."

The former angel wept into the other man's shoulders. He clench to Dean's arms and cried for the first time in his milennia of existence. Not just lonely tears that would cover his eyes and make them shine and never fall, but actual crying. Maybe it was because he was now human and his emotions ran more freely, maybe it was because he just lost his Grace and the hollow ached to much, maybe it was because he had seen his entire family fell. Maybe it didn't matter and he was just scared and sad.

Distancing himself enough as to look into the other man's eyes, he spoke between sobs, "He stole it, Dean," he cried, "He stole it and made them fall."

Dean understood perfectly. He needed no clarification, he hugged his angel harder -Grace or not Grace, Cas was still his angel- and swore to himself to kill that son of a bitch at the first chance he got. Dean had few people that he loved, and most of them were dead already. It was dangerous business damaging those few that were still alive, crossing a Winchester always was.

But he voiced none of his thoughts to the fallen angel in his arms.

"Come on, let's get you inside. It's cold in here," he said.

An arm around his waist, the other hand from Dean holding both of his own hands, Cas let himself be carried to the bunker. Dean made him sit at the table, he covered him with a blanket and prepared him some hot chocolate. Maybe Dean couldn't cure that cold hollow that was left where the angel's Grace had resided, not for now anyway, but he could at least take care of his human body.

"Hey," greeted Sam, his voice still groggy from sleep, not noticing that his brother was not alone, "Cas!" he exclaimed surprised once he noticed the state in which the fallen angel was. So weak, so broken, so human.

Sam was still debilitated, the effects from the trials were slowly leaving him. But not even that would change his concern for his friend.

"Cas, you okay?" he asked running to his side and resting a hand on his shoulder, he spared one desperate look at his brother whose face was blank, hiding all the emotions that threatened to break him in the inside.

"No," was the former angel's honest answer.

"What happened?" asked Sam, he knew about the fallen angels, but he just wanted to know what had happened to _his_ friend.

Before Cas could answer Dean left the cup of hot chocolate on the tablet in front of the angel. He didn't look at him or his brother while he did it, he didn't think he could manage it. He even doubted that he wanted to hear what Cas had to said. He was helpless in this situation, helpless about Cas, helpless about Sam. But he couldn't break, not now. Stepping back a bit, he leaned against the table to listen what his best friend had to say.

"I went to Heaven and found that Naomi had been neutralized. Metraton reduced me and pinned me to the chair and..." his impassive voice broke, but he forced himself to continue, "he sliced my throat and stole my Grace," he completed, tears lingering in his eyes once more, "It was all part of a spell. Then I woke up in the ground and saw every single one of my brothers and sisters fell."

Even Sam, the man who had a facility to voice out his feelings, had trouble speaking.

"Cas, I- I'm- I'm sorry," he said.

Dean cleared his throat, and continued as if his eyes weren't full of silent tears, "Drink, you'll feel better."

"I doubt it," answered Cas, but drank anyway.

"We should take you to a room, so you can get a shower and some sleep," said Dean, who wanted to extract himself from the awkward situation. He was never good at expressing his feelings, less alone to a public of two. If any sort of conversation or emotional reassurance was to happen between him and Cas he needed to be alone with him.

His brother took the silent cue and left, but not without patting Cas on the shoulder and saying, "We'll be there for you, Cas."

.

Dean guided Cas to the shower room and then left him to grab some of his clothes from his room. He was searching for appropriate clothes to borrow to his angel when the reality of everything started to sink in. The two persons that he cared about most in this God's forsaken world were broken. And he was helpless. He couldn't make Sam's health better and he couldn't restore Cas' Grace. His knuckles were white from clutching to the edges of the drawer.

When his feelings became too overwhelming, he knocked off the bedside lamp with one swift angry movement. The lamp fell to the floor, the bulb crashed and the light went out. Dean looked at the broken pieces and sighed. He'd have to fix it now.

With a pair of boxers and a T-shirt he left his room and went to find Cas.

"Cas, here I brought you some clothes," he said entering the shower room.

The fallen angel stepped out of the shower with a towel hanging around his waist. His bare chest still a bit wet shone like a sight for sore eyes. Dean gulped hard, this was something he had seen hundreds of time in his fantasies. The fantasies that he would do anything to not have. Not because Cas was in a male vessel, his own bisexuality had nothing to do with it. He had acknowledged that he liked men a long time ago. But there's not only a big difference between acknowledging and accepting, but he knew that what he felt wasn't just attraction to Jimmy's body -now Cas'- but to Cas himself.

And accepting those feelings... They were so strong that they scared him, they were better of locked under a cage. Still, he couldn't help but to a least acknowledge his feelings. Acknowledging but not accepting.

Even though, Cas' chest was as beautiful as he could ever imagine, this wasn't as one of his fantasies. In his fantasies Cas' eyes were dilated with lust, his gaze was penetrating as always and the passion that was so characteristic of the angel was there. That passion that burnt like a slow flame, all consuming but secure and patient. But right now, Cas' eyes were dull, and cold. They kept that penetrating feature, but it was not the same.

Their eyes locked together, searching the other's soul to feel reassurance. Neither of them spoke till they didn't found but they were looking for in the other.

"Here," said Dean handing him the clothes.

"Thank you, Dean," he said in his usual tone.

Cas grabbed his clothes and started to dress right there -luckily for Dean he started with the T-shirt. Dean was uncomfortable, for a few seconds he didn't know what to do, if to freak out and ask him to just hold his horses for a second, if to leave or if just turn around while Cas' finished. He ended up just deciding for the later.

The lack of sound indicated him that Cas was done dressing himself. Turning around he saw the former angel wearing his clothes. A black T-shirt with some worn out Led Zeppelin stamp and some dark brown boxers. The picture was just wrong. Not because Cas' was wearing _his_ clothes and _his_ underwear. Many of his fantasies did include that. But because it made him look so _human_.

Cas knew what the other was thinking because it was what he was thinking too. It was the lack of his power to do the most little things that remained him how useless he felt. Last time he lost his powers, it had been gradually, he had had time to get used to it. And he had been angry. But he had his Grace. Now he had let it been stolen from him, and in doing so, he made his whole family burn.

Castiel yawned.

"Come on, let's get you to bed," said Dean resting a hand in his shoulder to guide him, "Wait, here, take this," and he handed him one of the robes from the Men of Letters.

"What's the use of this piece of clothing?" asked Cas inspecting the cloth in his hands, head slightly tilt to a side.

Dean smiled genuinely at the common gesture from the angel.

"It's just so you don't go around the place in your underwear," explained the hunter, "It is, you know, a human tradition," he said casually.

"Oh," exclaimed Cas, he face frowned after the mention of the word 'human'.

Dean realized late what he said.

"I'll show you your room," he started saying, "you can even decorate... if you want..." his voice trailed off, _if you want to stay_ , would have been the right end to the phrase. But he didn't want to say it, he feared the answer. He didn't want to think of the possibility of Cas staying. He didn't want to get his hopes up, to think that his angel was finally going to stay just so he could leave him once more. Because he didn't want to think that as long as Cas needed him, the fallen angel would stay with him but that as soon as he didn't need Dean anymore or as soon as he found another 'right' thing to do, he would leave. It wasn't the moment to have those thoughts.

Once they arrived at the room, Dean turned on the lights. The bedroom was like his, the same white walls and the bed in the middle.

"There," he said, "make yourself comfortable," he motioned at the bed.

"Thank you, Dean," said Cas passing past him and going to the bed where he sat staring with his eyes fix in front of him.

It wasn't that the angel didn't know hot to get to sleep, he wasn't ready for it just yet. The simple action of 'going to sleep' was all to human, too vulnerable. Dean understood that, and he sat beside him.

"What is it, Cas? Talk to me," he said to the angel for the second time in less than four days.

"I'm human," he said as if that covered enough, but looking into Dean's eyes he knew it wasn't enough, "And I- I- This is all my fault, Dean. I should have listened to you."

"Cas—"

Dean didn't knew what to say, because it was true. Cas should have listened to him. He should have listened to him and trusted him, before continuing with the 'Heaven Trials'. He should have done it too, when he asked him not to open the gates of Purgatory. But once again, this was not the moment for this thoughts. So all he did was put a hand on the other's man shoulder and wait for the other to continue speaking.

"I'm scared, Dean. And I feel..." his voice dropped looking for the right words, "lost," he finished, "There are no words to describe what it was stolen from me. It was so holy and bright. And now everything seems so dull in comparison. It feels small, Dean, to be confined within this body," he finished looking at what once was Jimmy's body with a subtle gesture of disgust.

The gesture was small and barely notable, but Dean knew his angel well. Suddenly, the hunter was pissed. He didn't know if it was for all those feelings of betrayal that he kept pushing for later, or because he felt insulted as a human. He didn't know. He just had to get out of there.

"You should rest," he said and got up as fast as he could while trying not to seem so hastily about it.

Cas nodded and with slow movements plucked himself under the sheets.

"Goodbye, Dean," he said before the other got to pass the door.

"Goodbye, Cas," answered the hunter a bit taken aback.

He turned off the lights and left.

.

When Cas woke up it was midday. The smell of food made his stomach growl. He checked his garments to see if he was dressed accordingly to human standards. Normally, he didn't pay attention to such things. He either wasn't aware or found them to insignificant to care. But now that he was a human he felt the need to care. And he didn't want to piss Dean off, he had felt the distressed way in which he had departed early and he didn't want to make things worse. Since losing his Grace, Dean had been the one thing that kept him going. Sam was a soothing thing in his life, his friendship was something that he cherished. But he _needed_ Dean. And if he ever turned his back on him... Well, he didn't like the paths that that could lead to.

"Hey, Cas!" welcomed him Sam once he saw him enter the main area, he tried to be cheerful even when he felt like crap and the whole situation was crap.

The last days had been awful, and trying to finish the last trial had made enough angst happen. So he would try to be optimistic for his brother and his fallen friend. And damn him, if he couldn't be, he could well at least pretend it.

"Hello, Sam," greeted him Cas, "Hello, Dean."

"You arrived just in time for lunch," said Dean while he entered carrying a plate with several of his tasty burgers that Sam had grown to love.

"Isn't it customary to have breakfast after one wakes up?" asked Cas, head tilted at a side.

"Yeah, it is," laughed Sam, "but no when you wake up at midday."

"I apologize," was Cas answer.

"Free will, dude," said Dean while he sat at the table and motioned Cas to do the same, "that's the good thing about free will. You can wake up whenever the hell you want. No need to apologize."

Once Cas was sited, he sniffed the burger and then proceeded to eat it as if being pushed by Famine. Dean and Sam watched him eat with certain disbelief and surprise. When Cas finished Sam spoke.

"Wow! You were hungry, weren't you?"

"Well, I decided that if I'm going to be human, I might as well enjoy the perks that it entitles as much as I can," answered Cas, but there was no joy in his voice, only defeat.

Dean pushed away his plate, he had barely given one bite to his burger but he wasn't hungry anymore.

"Is there more?" asked Cas.

Dean gave him his burger and stormed out of the main area, into the hallway that lead to the bedrooms.

"Eat, Cas. I'll be back in a second," Sam excused himself and followed his brother into the hallway.

"What's the matter with you?" he confronted him once he had him face to face, "Why did you storm off like that?"

"Sam," Dean said in a warning tone, "I'm not in the mood to have this conversation."

"Well, and Cas is definitely not in the mood for your... mood swings," Sam spatted him trying not to raise the volume that much so Cas wouldn't hear them.

Dean gave him a dangerous glare.

"What's the matter with you? Please, Dean, trust me," he begged him.

And in the light of the recent events, the words softened Dean a bit.

"You want to know? You want to know?" he questioned his brother while he looked for the words that had a hard time coming into his mouth, "I already saw him like this. Remember when Zachariah took me to that future? This was how Cas was, taking delight in 'human pleasures'. And if he already started with food then tomorrow is going to be drugs and orgies and..." Dean emited a sad chuckle, "It seems that you- that Lucifer was right. It doesn't matter how many details I change, we always end up in the same place."

"Come on, it was just some food, it doesn't mean that he will end like that other Cas," argued Sam.

"It isn't the food, Sam, it's his eyes," he said almost desperate, struggling to not raise his voice too high, "His- his- his spark is gone and he just seem so broken. It's my fault, my fault, Sam, no matter what I do, Cas ends this way."

"Listen to me, Dean," said Sam with a firm voice, "None of this was your fault."

But trust Dean Winchester to find his share of guilt when he has none.

Sam's bloody cough chose that precise moment to appear again.

"See," said Dean grabbing the hand his brother used to cover himself and showing right into his face the blood that he tried to hide, "this should have been me. I break everyone I care about."

"No, Dean, you don't. First, I'm getting better, so stop blaming yourself. Second, it's only been two days and what happened to Cas was huge. So if he's going to overcome this he needs you. He needs to know that being human it's okay and that he's not useless. So suck it up," he finished with a last angry stare at his brother.

"Wow, it's nice to see that you finally grew up into big men's pants, baby brother," Dean said with a cocky smile.

Sam knew that that was his brother way of saying thank you for the advice. He wanted to say thank you to Dean for trusting him, instead he just said:

"Jerk," a genuine smile playing in his lips.

"Bitch."

.

"So what do humans do to, as you say it, 'kill time'?" asked Cas still wearing the robe that Dean had given to him.

The fallen angel was standing in the middle of the main area, looking lost. Sam was at the table, studying and organizing the files of the Men of Letters. Dean was at the other table, the projector on, about to enjoy the second season of Dr. Sexy that he had bought not that long ago.

"Well, you can do as nerd-bro there, and read a book or something like that. Or watch TV like me, or do whatever the hell you want that makes you happy," explained to him Dean.

Cas stared at the hunter for a few seconds, and then spoke in his forever passive voice:

"It would make me happy to watch TV with you."

"Oh, all right," exclaimed Dean trying not to seem suddenly embarrassed and to ignore the faint blush that was crepting into his cheeks, "Sit here," he said moving the chair next to him.

Sam tried to hide the small smirk that was forming in his lips.

They spent the rest of the evening watching Dr. Sexy, Dean knew the episodes by heart so he had no problem explaining Cas the plot whenever he got lost -something that happened rather often. He couldn't lie, he was enjoying the chance of doing this, just hanging out with Cas and being able to have him close. Which made him feel guilty because it was at the cost of Cas' Grace and obvious suffering that could be easily seen in his eyes. Again, he was lucky that he knew that much the episodes by heart, because most of the time, he stared at Cas' profile.

He admired what a great powerful being he had been, all that he had done for him, all that he had given up for him and what he had become now. He contemplated their history, all the joys and sorrows shared, the moments of extreme loyalty and deep betrayal. He watched the silhouette of those blue eyes and found a sadness as big as the sea. He searched for joy but he found none and his heart contracted in a fist affected by a sharp pain. All there was was sorrow, and guilt and pain.

By dinner time, Dean got up and prepared spaghetti with tomato sauce. He refused any help and insisted on Cas to continue watching the show arguing that he needed to catch up with the pop culture references. Sam complained about getting tired of watching Dr. Sexy, but when the food came he considered himself fully compensated for the suffering and ate in silence.

When it was late Dean decided that the marathon was over and started clearing the table. Cas wanted to help, but when he was getting up with his empty plate, he accidentally hit his glass and broke it. A piece of glass made a red gash in his right hand.

Dean almost dropped everything that he had in his hand and ran to his angel side.

"Here, let me see," his voice sightly more higher than usual.

"It's nothing," complained Cas, trying to remove his hand from Dean's, "just a small cut."

"You don't know it, you're not used to it," chastised him the hunter, finally succeeding in looking at the gash in the fallen angel's hands.

"Is it big?" asked Sam when he came back with the first aid emergency kit.

"No," answered Dean relief washing over his face, "it's more blood than anything. There's no rest of glasses so some alcohol and bandage should do it."

"I told you so," said Cas in his usual calm voice, "The human body: what a fragile thing it is," he commented with a new tone of dry humor.

Dean's heart stopped beating for a second. At the sound of his best friend voice he raised his eyes from the other's hand, scared of what he may found it. And he did found it. The same resentment of life that that dreadful future version of him had, had started to pool in the blue gaze.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so I'm not very proud of this chapter. It feels a bit rushed, and it focuses too much in the plot. But hey, if you can't handle me at my Moffat you don't deserve me at my RTD. But this is what happens when you write your story in your cell phone while traveling to go to university, with the stress of studying for exams and sleeping no more than 5, 4 hours per day (and hey, now in less than 5 hours I need to get up again but sleep is for peasants). But all considered (specially all the times that I asked myself 'what is english?) this chapter ain't that bad, it has its funny moments, its sexual tension and some plot. Next chapter is definitely better... and it has the smut :) So, enjoy. :)

_"Except I used to belong to a much better club. And now I'm powerless. I'm hapless, I'm hopeless. I mean, why the hell not bury myself in women and decadence, right? It's the end, baby. That's what decadence is for. Why not bang a few gongs before the lights go out? But then that's, that's just how I roll."_

This time he had seen it. Cas had looked at him, and he had given him a little smile, one that seemed out of place in his worn out face. Unlike the other smiles, this one had reached his eyes. It had relief on it. It was his end and he had known it. The sound that his blood and meat had made when the demon pierced him with the knife still echoed in his ears. His eyes had widened in pain, but when the blood had started dripping from his mouth, the smile was back again.

"See ya' later, Dean,"

With a dry dump his body fell to the floor.

And then he was in the backyard. Sam was looking at him but it was not Sam, it was Lucifer. The devil in his brother's body snapped once again the neck of his future self.

"I told you, Dean," he said while he walked slowly towards him, elegant as a tiger, crepting as a snake, " _Whatever you do, you will always end up here. Whatever choices you make, whatever details you alter, we will always end up—here. I win._ " Sam's face turned into Cas' face " _So, I win._ "

.

Dean woke up sweating, his breathing was fast, his chest rose and fell while the last traces of his nightmares faded away. Each time, for the last three nights was the same. The dream varied very little, namely, each night Cas' death was more violent and more heartbreaking. The worse part was his eyes, that worn out look and the relief they founded with death.

The hunter checked the hour in his watch. 6:00 AM. He was already to alert as to make use of the few hours that were left for sleeping. With a grunt he sat on his bed. He didn't want to wake up and face the day. He was too tired, he was always tired of life. He had a sick brother to take care of. Granted, he was getting better but still. And now, also a fallen angel. But most of all, he didn't want to face the same look of the Cas from his dream in the real Cas.

Grabbing his own robe, he went to the kitchen to prepare some tasty breakfast. Being in the bunker, with a proper kitchen, made him discover that he liked cooking. There was something soothing about it. Maybe the way that all the ingredients had to be put in the right proportion and order, or how everything took its own time.

By the time the pancakes he was cooking were done, he heard some footsteps approach.

"Hello, Dean," he heard.

And Dean was grateful that at least that hadn't changed, not yet.

"Hi, Cas," he replied, "You arrive just in time," he said setting the pancakes on the table.

The fallen angel had already picked up some of the things that were done for breakfast, so he helped the hunter with the coffee. Despite the big space on the table, they ate their breakfast sitting one next to the other. It was like whenever Dean wasn't trying to get as far away from the ex-angel as he could, the other one was glued to him.

They hadn't talked anymore about the Fall. Nothing save for when they were searching to any kind of news related to the events of a week ago -and a new that wasn't about the surprising meteor shower.

Sam arrived while they were finishing eating. He was thankful for the pancakes that they had saved for him and ate fast, grabbing his notebook as soon as he was finished.

"Dude, you got an addiction," complained Dean from the kitchen while he washed the dishes and Cas dried them.

"Shut up," grunted his brother.

When the kitchen was clean, including Sam's dishes, Dean approached his brother.

"Found anything interesting?" he asked.

"No. Well, it depends," answered Sam, "If you're talking about any kind of omens, then, no. But I did found out a series of interesting killings," he said turning his computer so it faced Dean, "People go missing for three days and when they appear they do so with their hearts completely burned."

"Seems like something a demon could do," if that was the case then those deaths were on him, he, after all, stopped Sam from closing the Gates of Hell, letting all the demons to roam free. Not that he regretted his decision, but it was his responsibility.

"I don't know," replied Sam, "but it's worth checking out."

Dean sighed.

"I think we should call Garth, tell him to investigate and to call us if he needs any help."

"Why call Garth? Why don't doing it ourselves?" asked Sam utterly confused by his brother's words.

"It's... I don't think that we're prepared for it," said Dean, resignation in his voice.

"Whoa, are you implying that Garth is more prepared than us?" questioned him Sam in disbelief, "Are we talking about the same Garth?"

Dean got up from the chair were he had sit to look at the computer.

"I'm just saying, with you still coughing half of your lung out and recently demoted Cas over there, we aren't exactly in top conditions!" anger started to rise up in Dean.

"May I intercede?" asked the fallen angel.

Dean didn't answer, his mouth shut tight, so Sam did instead.

"Go ahead, Cas," he sighed.

"I am only speaking on my behalf, but I'm ready to take on this case. Even though I may still be, as you call it, _socially awkward_ ", said Cas, gesturing some quotation marks along the last two words, "I'm still good enough when it comes to body fight or managing a blade. I said I wanted to become a hunter once, and I want to be one now," Cas stared deeply into Dean's eyes.

The hunter didn't like that memory of Cas last try to become a hunter. Because, as always, it ended up with the angel leaving him.

"I'm perfectly capable of taking care of myself. You don't need to come with me if you don't want to."

Dean didn't like the idea of the angel hunting on his own. Damn it, he didn't even like the idea of a human Cas alone. However, he didn't want to impose himself. He wanted _Cas_ to _choose_ him.

"Fine, if that's what you want," spatted Dean turning around, giving Castiel the chance to walk away and leave him.

Sam looked at both men and sighed.

"Guys," he said with a reconciling tone, "Look Cas, you need us. You still hadn't learn how to manage yourself between humans," Cas opened his mouth, probably to come out with some literal retort, but Sam shushed him with a finger, "And I for one, I'm not staying behind. We all need this," the hunter gave a warning look towards his brother, "And Dean, don't you try to deny it. You need it as much as I do."

Because Sam wasn't stupid. He knew how much it was killing his brother to see a broken Cas and not being able to help him. Normally, Dean would bury himself in alcohol and one-night-stand girls. But this time he was letting all that frustration to cook up inside of him, and Sam thought that he knew the reason. Probably, because he didn't want Cas to see him and pick up the habits. Probably, his brother was afraid of being the reason of why Cas turned into his post-apocalyptic future self. So Dean needed a hunt to release the tension. A probably faster solution would be to lock up Dean and Cas in a room with a bed and leave them both there for a while. But that would be getting into his brother's sex life and that was a line he didn't want to cross if possible.

Not that he wasn't considering it.

.

"So Team Free Will is functioning again," exclaimed Dean clasping his hands standing outside the Impala's driver's sit.

"Will I be able this time to travel in the front seat?" asked Cas from the other side of the car.

Sam and Dean exchanged a conspiratorial look.

"Nope," said Sam entering the vehicle by the passenger seat.

"That's something you've got to earn!" shouted Dean while getting into the Impala.

"And how can I earn it?" questioned the fallen angel as he entered in the back seat.

Dean took one second more than necessary in answering. The game had taken a more serious approach to him. Maybe, it was manipulating, but he didn't care. Without abandoning the playful tone, he said:

"You have to stick around if you want to find out!"

Cas stared at him. He didn't know if he had caught his indirect, or if was his classical nerd angel behavior.

In the road, Sam started lecturing Cas with 'How to Ask Questions in a Hunt 101', with the occasional intervention of Dean. A town before their intended destination, the eldest brother left the route. They had decided that Cas needed a new suit, one they said more FBI and less I'm-here-to-count-your-taxes.

"Wanna come?" asked Dean to his brother.

"Nah, I prefer to do some more research in the web about the deaths," was Sam's answer while he took out his computer.

"Are you planning on finding Wi-Fi here?" questioned Dean with a puzzled look while he gestured at the street where the Impala was parked.

"Why not?" was Sam's honest answer.

A few seconds later, the notebook was connected to a free Wi-Fi.

"Dude, sometimes I'd swear that you did a pact with Crowley about it."

Sam stayed in silence for a few seconds.

"Jerk."

"Bitch."

.

Cas and Dean entered the men clothes store. To the common bystander the former angel's face was just neutral, stoic. But Dean had never been the common bystander, and he knew his best friend's expressions very well, so he could tell the disgust expression that lay very subtly in the otherwise neutral features of Castiel. The hunter knew that it wasn't about telling the socially awkward angel about the necessity of buying new clothes, but about the necessity per se. _Needing_ to buy something as mundane as clothes spoke about limitation, the limitations to which a human being was confided. A human being couldn't just with a small movement of his hand clean away all the dirt or repair any item of clothing anew. They needed washing machines for that, or sewing, or _to buy new clothes._

Acquiring a variety of clothes was a reminder of Cas' humanity, that he didn't had his Grace anymore. So far he had been content with using Dean's clothes. That way they had a small illusion of it being temporal, but it wasn't going to be anymore Cas using Dean's clothes or even Jimmy's, this was going to be Cas' own clothes.

Yes, Cas understood the logical decision of buying new clothes, but it didn't mean that he didn't resent it. And that new drop of resentment that was gathering up in the blue pool of Cas' eyes could be seen by Dean. And Dean's heart sunk a bit more, because each new amount of resentment in _his_ angel's eyes was one step closer to the Cas of that horrible future that Zachariah had once sent him. And if there was something that Dean feared as much as losing his brother, and probably even more than losing Cas forever, was seeing Cas transform into that future version of his.

"Come on, it'll be fun," tried Dean to lighten up the mood.

"I don't think I agree with your definition of 'fun'," said Cas with his monotone voice.

Dean just sighed.

"Can I help you?" asked a female attendant, a green waistcoat, a gray tight skirt and a big forced smile were part of her uniform.

"Yes," answered Dean, "I was looking for suits for him," he completed pointing at Cas.

The attendant looked at the man using the worn out trenchcoat and blue suit- Cas had changed on his usual clothes before leaving the Bunker- and started talking about the different pros of different models. Cas tilted his head and looked at Dean with a silent plea for help in his stare. The hunter would have liked to laugh if it wasn't for the lack of life that you could notice a little bit deeper in the blue eyes.

Dean brought the attendant's attention back to himself and asked her for the right clothes. Then she was gone and moments later she returned with several suits for Cas to try. The hunter grabbed them and quickly took the fallen angel towards one of the changing booths, just in case the big nerd thought it was appropriate to start changing his clothes in the middle of the store.

Waiting Cas to get changed was a slow task, for someone who had had spent most of his life as a wave of celestial intent and the rest had always had his _mojo_ to help him, it was understandable that getting dressed, specially if it was a suit, was something complicated. So Dean went around the store picking up clothes that his ex-feathered friend would need as stock. Some shirts, socks, underwear... He was wondering around the tie section, when he heard him call him.

"Dean," he called with his impossible low voice.

The hunter turned around to look at his friend. Cas was wearing a light gray suit that was a bit too big for him, it hanged loosely around his shoulders and the pants were also too big and long for him.

Dean smiled.

"Sorry, dude," he said putting a hand on his shoulder, "you're gonna have to change again. This is definitely not for you," he ended with a few pats on the other man.

Castiel gave him a tired look.

"Sorry, man, try the other one."

The fallen angel went to the booth again to change and Dean continued looking at the ties. He wasn't planning on buying any, but then he saw a blue tie that was identical to the one that Cas already had. Cas definitely needed a new tie, but any other tie would look odd on him. But this one... Dean looked at the brand new fabric. This was perfect.

He went to the cashier, he intended for the tie to be a gift, well, everything was a gift already considering that he was 'paying' for everything, but he meant for the tie to be special. The attendant was wrapping the tie in a box, "It will look wonderful on your boyfriend, sir," she said.

"No, we- no-" he stumbled, blushing immediately.

But at this point Cas had decided to come out of the booth, this time with a perfectly fitting black suit and Dean decided that there was no point in denying what for almost every sense of the word they already were, or that he wanted to be, or well, fuck, it just didn't matter.

"Wow, Cas, you look- you look..."

"Does the proportions of this attire fit well?" asked Cas.

"Yeah, you look..." was unable to finish Dean while he appreciated how the coat marked perfectly the other man's chest, and how the pants were tight in all the right places. And yes, Dean did stare at Castiel's ass, no point in denying that either, "amazing," he finished finally remembering to look at his friend in the eyes.

Cas just stared back at him.

After like half a minute of just staring at each other, Dean finally went to pay for all the stuff they were buying. He waited till they were outside and where he thought that none was paying any attention to them, to give Cas the tie he had bought.

"Here, Cas," he said handing him the purple box that contained the tie, "I know that you don't like new clothes and I understand why. But your tie is all worn out and you need a new one. So I saw this one, and I thought that..." Dean was babbling. And since when did fucking Dean Winchester babble.

"Thank you, Dean," Cas said to him, holding the open box with the tie neatly folded.

"If you want I could teach you how use it," he offered, "It's about time you do," joked the hunter.

"I'd appreciate that very much," Castiel answered, a tiny glimmer of something akin to hope shone in his eyes.

Dean saw that, and he swore to himself that he would do anything to keep that glimmer there.

.

When they got back into the Impala, Sam told them that he thought he had found a lead on the case. It wasn't much, but at least it told them the family member's of which victim start interrogating first. It turned out that the victims had appeared with the same mark burnt into their bodies. A circle cut in half inside a triangle.

Being the big nerd he was, Dean totally made a Deathly Hallow reference. To which Cas tilted his head and his usual phrase came out of his lips. Sam smiled -and coughed and this time there was almost no blood on it- and told them that they should start with the victim that was a die hard Harry Potter fan.

"Potterhead," corrected him Dean.

"What?" this time not even Sam understood the reference.

"Die hard Harry Potter fans are called Potterheads," he explained.

"Dude, and then _I'm_ the nerd," complained Sam.

"Is Harry Potter a celebrity like Dr. Sexy?" asked Cas still confused.

Both brothers laughed happily, and proceeded to explain the Harry Potter world to the fallen angel. Sam had only seen the movies, and Dean being totally _not_ a nerd, had of course, _not_ read the books too. Part of Dean wished that Charlie was here, she would totally enjoy the conversation. But then, she didn't like Ron and Hermione ending up together, and he so would not get into a shipping war with her. Not at least in front of his brother, not if he wanted to maintain his not-nerd reputation, something at which he was failing miserably, as much as in maintaining his totally-straight reputation. When they arrived to the haunted town, poor Cas was more confused than before. For a moment, he thought that Rowling was a witch they needed to haunt.

"All right, we're here," said Dean coming to a stop at the center of the town. It was six in the morning yet, so there was no people in the street and all the shops were closed save for a Big Anderson's a couple of streets away.

"Cas, would you hand me my bag," asked Sam, "We need to get changed," he said going for his FBI suit neatly folded inside his bag.

"Yeah," agreed with a weak voice his big brother.

Sam and Dean used to get changed together inside the car. They usually didn't book a room in a motel unless they knew that there was really a case going on, or that they needed to spend the night there. So changing inside the Impala was something usual. But his brother's tone told him that this time it wasn't going to be as other times. He could feel the sexual tension suddenly emanating from Dean. He had felt it when they arrived from the men store. And, God he had felt it inside the Bunker for those five days since Cas' arrival. He knew that the tension between his brother and the former angel was growing bigger everyday and that soon it would explode. And he so didn't want to be there when it happened. Not because Cas was male, or actually was inside a male vessel, semantics aside, he just didn't want to be involved at all in his brother's sex life, regardless of the gender of his partner. He did want Cas and Dean to be happy together, they both deserved it. But that from actually wanted to be involved in it, _big_ difference.

"Okay, I think I'm going to go and get dressed in that Big Anderson's that we saw there," yeah, getting changed in a public restroom was way better.

Dean stared at his brother with a look that was halfway between 'thank you' and 'I'm going to kill you in your sleep'. Sam left in a hurry.

The good thing about Cas sitting in the backseat, was that it allowed them both to get changed without having to see the other's underwear. But Dean still had a good view of Cas' naked chest. And man, he pants were starting to get tight. Cas had no trouble of getting dressed himself, but when it came to his tie...

When Dean, allowed himself another glance at Cas through the review mirror, he saw the other, now fully dressed, making a mess of his new tie.

Dean laughed, "Man, you need help," and already dressed he stepped out of the car and got back in the back sit with Cas.

"Here," he said accommodating himself at Cas' back and before he could notice he had the other man between his legs, his chest pressed to his back.

Suddenly, all traces of the previous laugh had died in the atmosphere, and the sexual tension was fully touchable once more. With hands more steady than he thought himself capable of, Dean undid the tie from Cas neck.

"Like this," he said while he starting doing Cas tie explaining all the involved steps with a voice more hoarse than usual and pressed firmer against the other's back.

Cas' tie was finally done, but he couldn't get himself to move. His now full erection was pressed against Cas butt and he was sure that the fallen angel could feel it.

"Dean," whispered Cas, his voice even more deep than usual.

Dean swallowed hard, not trusting himself to speak, not that he knew what to say anyway. All he did was press his full body firmer against the other, relishing just on the contact of their bodies together. Cas only sighed while he pressed back against the hunter's body.

Dean's head was over the other's shoulder, their cheeks pressed together and all he had to was turn his head. And he was doing so, slowly, while the angel, Grace or nor Grace, he _was_ still an angel, at least in what it mattered to him, turned his head too. Their lips just an inch apart, they were breathing each other's breaths.

"Cas," breathed Dean.

And that was it. Damn it all, he was going in. But before their lips could come into contact the damned phone rang.

"Fuck," cursed Dean untangling himself from Cas' warmth.

"What?" he spatted to his brother on the phone. This better be good, or he sweared to God that he _was_ going to murder his brother in his sleep.

"Another body appeared," said Sam who had been speaking to one of the waitress at Big Anderson's, who was the niece of the local sheriff, "same as the others."

"All right, I'm meeting you at the dinner," said Dean still pissed.

"Ok, and sorry," apologized Sam, Dean's tone had been more than obvious.

"Yeah, yeah" he said while hanging up, looking back at Cas, he explained, "Another body appeared, we need to go."

The fallen angel's face was still flushed, his eyes still black from lust. Dean had to really concentrate to not send all to hell and kiss that beautiful face to oblivion.

Thinking of Wendigos in seductive poses to calm himself, Dean drove to pick up Sam, and together they went where the last body had appeared.

"FBI," said Sam and Dean together taking out the badges to the police official in charge, wearing their suits, Cas doing the same behind him but without uttering a word, his trenchcoat over his new suit.

"So, fill us in," asked Sam.

"I didn't thought the FBI would be interested in this," said the sheriff, his mustache dancing in his face every time his lips moved to speak, "The body appeared two hours ago, the girl over there found him. We still have no ID but at least we know where he was staying. The advantages of having only one motel in the area. We suppose we'll find something there."

"Do you know how he died?" asked Dean.

"I'd say he drowned in the river, but that bloody burnt heart may tell otherwise," he point to his left, where the shore of a river and the body lay, "hell, but we can't be sure until the autopsy."

"Thank you, sheriff, we'll take it from here," said Sam, and when the man walked away he turned to his partners, "You two go check the body, I'll interview the witness."

Dean and Cas got close to the body. He was a twenty something boy, he was wearing a black T-shirt where the words "The angels have the phone box" could be read. A pin with the legend "Hufflepuff pride" was attached to it. The body seem to have only a few hours dead, but the water from the river had made it look worse, accelerating the decomposing rate . Dean leaned beside it and with a pen moved the right hand where he had noticed something.

"Look," he said to Cas.

"A Deathly Hallow symbol," Cas commented, he had learnt that much, "like the other bodies."

"Not quite, this one is tattooed."

.

"I already talked to the police," said the girl.

"I know, but I am FBI," explained Sam with infinite patience, "So, did you know the victim?"

"Not exactly," she answered, "I had only met him face to face last night. But we've known each other for two years."

"Do you know his name?"

"I know his first name only, Matt. Then we talked only using our usernames."

"How did you found him?"

"We met last night and after chatting a while, we went to each of our rooms to blog together. And suddenly he was off line, and he didn't answer his phone or anything so I went to look for him... And there I found him!" she started crying desperately.

"Did he say anything weird or behaved differently before disappearing?" asked Sam totally not mentioning how both had went to just blog in different rooms, "What a bunch of virgin nerds," he thought.

"No..." she said but after a short silence she added, "But he did say something about the lights flickering and a demon coming, but I thought he was just kidding around about those books he used to read."

"Well, thank you for your time, and sorry for your... loss" he said, walking away from her.  
He met with Dean and Cas who had finished examining the body and were standing there just eye fucking. Sam cleared his throat.

"So, found anything interesting?" he asked.

"He did had a Deathly Hallows symbol but it was tattooed, not burnt," explained Dean.

"But his heart was indeed burnt. That was most likely the cause of death," informed Cas who had been touching and smelling the corpse, despite losing his ability to tell the whole story of the body with just smell, he still could recognize chemicals in the air unnoticeable to others.

"And you?" asked Dean.

"Well, he was one big nerd and he had only been missing for a few hours, so he died almost right after he disappeared," Sam told them.

"Okay, so we need to head to the morgue, and then we check out the motel," organized them Dean.

"Oh, and did I mention that he said that the lights flickered and said something about a demon?" added Sam with a slug smile.

"Well, that just makes things more interesting," said Dean with dry humor.

"Yeah, but guess what books he read besides Harry Potter?" Sam looked at his brother with a suggestive and sarcastic look.

"Oh, no," exclaimed Dean.

"Oh, yes," answered Sam.

Cas tilted his head and was about to say that he didn't understand the reference but an 'I'll explain you later' look from Dean silenced him.

.

After showing the FBI badges again, they had entered the morgue. They took out the bodies, two females and one male. Cas smelled each one of the bodies.

"Dude, it doesn't matter how many times you do that, is still fucking weird," complained Dean.

"Now we know that they all died exactly like the last one, they heart burnt," commented Cas as if that put and end to every possible argument.

"Yeah, you can smell them," said Sam, "or just read the autopsy report where it says exactly that," he finished wearing one of his classic bitch faces.

Cas didn't said anything.

"Look at the marks," said Dean pointing at the neck of one of the victims where the symbol was, "it doesn't seem as a fresh burn."

Just as he had finished talking the medical examiner came in, a woman in her early thirties.

"Do you need any help?" she asked.

"Yes... Sally," said Dean reading his name from the ID in her lab coat and wearing one of his flirtatious smiles. "What can you tell me about this?" he said pointing at the Deathly Hallows symbol of one of the victims.

"Oh, the police had told me to ignore them," she said.

"Yet what can you tell me," Dean said taking the flirting to his voice too.

"Well, I'm pleased to tell you that I'm not that good at following orders, so I did examine them," she smiled.

Dean smiled back at her.

"What is interesting is that these burnt marks don't seem to have been made normally. They look as if they had been made progressively. As if the burnt has been slowly done... over the course of three days, I'd said," her voice had trailed down, "but that just seems impossible," she added.

"Ok, thank you for your help," said Dean a smile still in his face.

"Oh, anytime you want, honey," she answered with a subtle wink.

"We are leaving, thank you," said Sam.

They all turned, going to the door, but the doctor stopped Dean with a hand, and put a card in his pocket.

"There you have my number," she said still smiling at the hunter, "in case you need my help again," finished Sally with a wink before stepping aside so he could leave.

Dean thanked her winking back at her. Cas was the last to leave.

"He won't require your help anymore," he said with a low tone, almost threatening, before finally stepping out of the morgue, leaving a stunned doctor behind.

.

Cas reminded silent during the entire trip to the motel, and while Sam booked rooms for them -they were more than five hours away from the bunker. He also said nothing when Sam said that there were only two rooms available thanks to the Harry Potter convention that was being held in the town, which did not only incremented the amount of people at the motel, but also complicated their investigation that appeared to revolve around the famous wizard. He didn't utter a word when Sam announced that the rooms were one with a single bed, that he automatically claimed for himself, and the other one with one, and only one, king-sized bed.

When they inspected Matt's room he only spoke to comment what was necessary, like the lack of sulfur or the high readings of the EMF next to the victim's collection of Harry Potter books.

Nor Sam nor Dean knew what had caused the sudden change in the fallen angel behavior as neither of them had heard what the man had said to Sally.

.

"This site is totally fucked up," said Sam from the second victim's notebook.

They had went to check the houses of the local victims to interrogate their families and to check if there was any other connection between them. With the first victim they had found a fully Harry Potter designed room, but besides several fake wands, the entire collection in DVDs, and various Gryffindor robes, they hadn't found anything. In the second vic's house they had only found the books and the movie collection in VHS and DVD. After hacking into her computer, Sam had found the victim's blog.

"They're mental," he complained after reading the eight post that said 'does he have the booty?'

"Anything that might be related to her death?" asked Dean.

"Nothing," said Sam closing the notebook.

"I suggest that we go to the third victim's house;" said Cas who continued not talking unless it was necessary and avoiding Dean as much as he could.

As the other vic's house was only a few blocks they went walking. Suddenly, a man wearing a black coat and carrying a handful of pamphlets came to them.

"Save our children!" he claimed, "Save them from the word of the Devil!" he gestured while he gave them one flier.

'HARRY POTTER A SATANIC WORK' it was titled. A lot of crap saying how Harry Potter turned kids into occultism filled the pamphlet.

"Yeah, we'll take it into account," said Dean trying to move away from the man blocking his way.

"You don't understand!" claimed desperately the Man, "They're claiming our children for the devil. We must stop them!"

"Ok, buddy, as you say," agreed Dean as when you talk to a crazy person.

"You work with the government," the man said, "you must help me!"

"Exactly, and if you don't move away right now, I'm gonna arrest you for obstructing federal agents," Dean threatened, he was not in the mood for games, Cas sudden behavior change had him frightened.

The man finally moved away, letting them pass.

.

After checking that the third victim was also a Potterhead, they headed to a dinner. Sam with his notebook that he had retrieved from the Impala, checked the Internet for more data. Dean ordered a cheeseburger for him and another for Cas, despite the silent treatment he received from the other man, he was still trying to reach out the fallen angel.

They ate in silence. After a while, when he had almost finished eating his salad, Sam spoke.

"Look what I found," he said, "the three vics were helping organize the convention."

"So what? We rule out demon and throw in the table angry spirit that has a thing against Harry Potter?" asked Dean with skepticism.

"I think it actually isn't as far off as it sounds," said Sam, "Look at this," he turned his laptop so it faced Dean and Cas, "Two years ago a fourteen years old girl died, she was heading to the next town's cinema to watch the seventh Harry Potter movie, in his dad stolen car. Apparently, he had forbidden her to read the books or watch the movies. She went missing for three days, when she was returning, she crashed and died when a piece of iron from the car stabbed her in the heart."

"That may fit as to how the victims are dying," argued Cas.

"Yes," agreed Sam, "and check who was her dad."

"The crazy man," said Dean when his brother showed him the picture.

"Exactly."

"So what you say, what makes our poor muggleborn to go all Bellatrix into her fellow friends," asked Dean.

"Well, maybe it isn't exactly her," argued Sam.

"You said she fitted," said Cas with his head tilted to a side.

"Yes," answered Sam, "but maybe she is not acting on her own. Maybe her dad is controlling her."

"Nice way of keeping children away from occultism," exclaimed Dean with sarcasm.

"It fits," said Sam, "Dad never liked Harry Potter and blames it for killing her daughter. Now a bunch of kids are organizing a con and Dad wants to stop them no matter the cost."

"Ok, so we start by investigating the dad."

.

They had passed by the motel and changed into regular clothes, for Cas it meant Jimmy's attire. Then, they had searched for the crazy man, named Arthur Clent, all around town. Finally, they had found him in front of Big Anderson's, giving fliers to the people passing by who, already used to him, didn't pay him any attention. When the sun set down, the amount of people in the streets diminished abruptly -the joy of life in the suburbs-, so Clent took his wrecked car -the same in which his daughter had found her death- and left. The boys followed him in the Impala to an old abandoned factory.

"Why bad guys always pick places like this?" complained Sam, "Why never a five star motel or something like that?"

"Yeah," agreed Dean, "why don't you ask him why it couldn't be butterflies?"

"What do insects have to do with chasing bad guys?" asked Cas confused.

"Harry Potter reference, Cas," explained Dean, "we need to _at least_ make you watch the movies."

"I'm not interested into watching movies with you," said Cas with an impassive voice, "So you can employ your time in activities that you find more pleasant."

Anger started boiling up inside Dean, Cas attitude since they left the morgue had finally finished wore him out.

"What do you mean by mor-" a girl's scream coming from inside the factory interrupted Dean.

Without uttering another word, the three men left the car and ran inside. Sam and Dean carried their guns, while Cas carried his blade. The scream was heard again, and guided them into one of the big areas of the factory.

"You came," said Clent with a creepy smile, who was waiting for them in a corner of the room.

The scream was heard again.

"Oh, allow me," said Clent going to one of the sides of the room where an old CD player was on. The man turned it off.

"So it was you then," accused him Sam angry, gun pointing at the man, "you're turning the ghost on those kids."

"Oh, come on, those aren't innocent kids," spatted Clent, "They're conspirators, workers of the Devil, trying to drag more souls into Hell."

"Yeah, 'cause you're worker of God, using a spirit to kill them," said Dean filled with sarcasm.

"I AM!" screamed Clent throwing the CD player off the table in an angry fit, "Disarm them, sweetie."

A cold wind came out of nowhere, and suddenly Sam and Dean's guns, along with Cas' blade, were on the floor next to Clent.

"You see, when my Ellie died, I got depressed. I wondered how I had sinned to be punished in such way. But then I realized that I wasn't the sinner, it was her, and she met her punishment," a dangerous spark danced in his eyes, "God spoke to me, he told me what my mission was. I am intended to stop those who follow the Devil. I am God's chosen one!"

"God did not speak to you," said Cas stepping ahead, getting closer to the man.

"Cas, no!" said Dean and tried to grab him, but the fallen angel would not stop.

"In fact, God has not spoken to anybody in a long time," said Cas, hate pouring like bile out of his deep voice, "God has left us and he doesn't care anymore."

"Heretic!" shouted the man scandalized, "I won't let you utter another pagan word out of your mouth!" taking a hand to his chest and grabbing something in there, he shouted one more time, "Ellie, kill him! Kill him now!"

The ghost of the fourteen years old girls materialized in front of Cas. She stared at him for one second, and then extended a hand towards the angel, burying it in his chest.

"Cas! No!" shouted Dean desperately.

Cas' screams filled the air.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cliffhanger!
> 
> (And yes, the nerd was strong in this chapter)


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm proud of this chapter, and it's the first smut I write that I truly like. This was the whole point of this fic, it has THE smut, Destiel and some more Destiel. So, I hope you like it.
> 
> Enjoy!

"Cas! No!" screamed Dean while the ghost was burning Cas' heart from the inside.

"You know, the good thing about you coming here is that I don't have to wait those three days for the mark to appear. The killing is much more direct in here," explained Clent casually as if Cas wasn't screaming a few feet away from him.

The ghost vanished into thin air when Sam slashed through her with a rusted stick of iron.

"Old factories, bad place for a ghost," he said, and then he knelt next to his friend, "Cas, you okay?" he asked.

"Yes," Cas said with barely a breath.

"Watch out!" shouted Dean who had grabbed another stick of iron and slashed the spirit that had reappeared behind Cas.

"You made a mistake coming here," said Clent smiling, "Ellie, kill them all."

Sam got up immediately and stayed back to back with Dean, iron ready to swing in his hand.

"How do you think he's controlling her?" asked Sam while dodging an attack from the ghost.

"The thing in his neck!" answered Dean while attacking the spirit with the iron.

Cas who had stayed crouched on the floor, crawled and retrieved his blade, then he jumped on Clent. The man fell to the floor with the former angel over him. And after some struggling, Cas had managed to cut the necklace with his blade and was then standing with it in his hand.

"I have come to the understanding that you need this," he said raising the hand with the necklace, "so I think that this will do you no good."

With a swift moment Cas threw the amulet to the floor, smashing it into a million pieces. The man shouted and a piercing growl was heard. Next thing, the shape of the girl was in front of him.

"You made me kill them," she said, her voice filled with echos of death.

She then buried her hand into her father's chest and watched him bend in pain. Flames covered both of them for a second and when the fire were gone so was she, while he had dropped dead to the floor. His face was covered in Deathly Hallows symbols.

"I believe the hunt is over," said Cas turning around to face the brothers.

They were both panting hard from fighting the ghost and both their faces were frozen in a expression halfway between shock and worry. Sam was the first to come out of it, his face breaking into a big smile.

"Yeah, Cas, good work!" he congratulated him.

Dean didn't say anything, his face more somber than before. Sam threw the stick of iron to a corner of the factory, and Dean copied him. After picking up their guns, and throwing Sam's to its owner, the eldest hunter finally spoke.

"Come on, let's go."

They went to the car in an awkward silence. Cas was still angry and bothered from before. Dean was angry since the previous talk in the car, and was even more pissed off since the events in the factory. And poor Sam was kind of happy for the end of a good hunt without anyone getting hurt, well, too much hurt, Cas almost got his heart burnt, but it was still a good hunt. However, he would give anything to get away from his brother and his friend. Hell, he might just call Crowley and finish closing the Gates of Hell if it avoided him the awkward car ride that was waiting for him.  
And the youngest hunter was not let down. They drove the way back to the town center in a heavy silence. Dean stopped in front of Big Anderson's, and barely blurting the words 'getting dinner', got off the Impala.

"So..." said Sam once he was alone with Cas, anything to break the tension a bit.

"Yes, Sam?" asked Cas.

The fallen angel was not angry at Sam, he was just angry at Dean, life and God. In fact, he appreciated his friendship with the youngest hunter very much.

"The symbols..." he said, bringing up the first topic that came to his mind.

Cas waited in a respectful silence for Sam to continue, which actually didn't help at all.

"They appeared to target the victim," he continued.

"Yes, I think so," agreed Cas.

"And it took three days for the Deathly Hallows mark to fully appear."

Cas nodded.

"Also, the victims disappeared for three days."

"Yes," confirmed Cas, "the victims were most probably carried away by the spirit and were slowly killed during the interval of three days."

"'Fraid so" muttered Sam, "Though that doesn't explain the fourth vic."

"He was probably targeted by his tattoo. As the mark was fully imprinted on him, that probably made the ghost to kill him immediately."

"Lucky bastard," commented Sam.

Cas would have probably argued that they didn't know if the vic had been born out of wedlock, but Dean's return to the car ended all possibilities of continuing the conversation. The tension that Sam had worked so hard to get rid of was back at full force.

They drove in silence once more. When they arrived at the motel Sam grabbed the bag with his dinner and practically ran to his room. Whatever was between his brother and his angel was about to explode, and he still maintained his position of not wanting to be there when it did. As things were, it will end in a fist fight or hard sex. And he _so_ didn't want to be a witness for that. Remembering that the rooms were adjacent one to the other, he cursed internally. He prayed to God, that the walls were thick enough, else a rough night was waiting for him.

.

With both their dinners in hand, Dean opened the door to their room and entered. He practically threw the bags to the table and waited for Cas to enter before slamming the door behind him.

"What the hell were you thinking?" he snapped at the fallen angel directly.

"What was I thinking when?" Cas spatted at him, _"When I rebelled for you? When I left my whole garrison for you?"_ he almost said, but didn't, instead he waited for the answer in silence.

"What were you thinking when you provoked Clent? Or when you jumped at him?" he said really slow, every word loaded with anger, "What were you thinking when you almost get yourself killed?"

"Well, strange at it may seem to you, I'm not a baby in a trenchcoat!" answered Cas, his voice raising, "I had spent several millennia fighting before you were even born and I can very well handle a ghost and a crazy man."

"Yeah, what a great job you did when she was burning your heart," was Dean's comeback.

"And what do you care?" asked him Cas tilting his head.

But it was not one of his usual head tilts. It wasn't to a side as they usually were. This time it was tilted back, his jaw ahead of the rest of his face. Just as the Cas from 2014 did.  
Dean snapped. Anger flared through him in great waves. Grabbing the fallen angel by the arms, and taking advantage of the fact that Cas was now an equal match to him when it came to force, he pushed him against the wall.

"Dammit, Cas!" Dean say staring at those deep blue eyes only inches apart, "How do you dare? How do you fucking dare?" he panted, piercing the other with his gaze.

Cas remained silent.

"Don't you know it?" he questioned him hard, "Didn't I tell you I need you already? Didn't I make myself clear?"

Cas looked at him defiantly. His eyes spoke of his jealousy and although he didn't spoke about Dean's flirting with the doctor, the hunter understood. Suddenly, Cas' behavior was crystal clear.

"Dammit, Cas!" he insulted again, "Don't you make me say it," he said, their faces closer, their breaths mixing together, one of Dean's arms against the wall, the other one still grabbing the fallen angel's one, bodies pressed together, "Not like this. Not like this," he whispered looking at Cas' mouth.

Anger gone, his emotions opened for the other one to read them. Dean raised his eyes and locked them with the man pinned underneath him. Cas face softened, the resentment he had worked up as a shell had fallen. Breathing hard, he stared at the man that he had fallen in love with before he even knew what love was.

"I won't just stand and watch you transform into him," said Dean like in a plea, or like a bed, actually, "I won't."

And Cas remembered the talk that they had had years ago. About the time when Zachariah had send Dean to an alternative future. About the time when he found out that his charge loved him.

Fallen angel and hunter stared at each other, this time they weren't eye fucking, they were making love to each other with their eyes. No Dean nor Cas would be able to tell who moved first. But suddenly their lips were locked together and they were kissing passionately. All the emotions that they had held secret were pouring through that one kiss. All the fears, all the doubts, all the love.

When they need for oxygen became to much of a need to be ignored, they drew apart. Dean looked into the impossible blue eyes of _his_ angel, he knew he had to make Cas feel loved. After a very tender caress to the side of his face, Dean kissed him again but softly this time. Their tongues danced together, tasting each other's unique flavor.

"Cas," he breathed like the sweetest plea to ever have existed on this earth.

The fallen angel shivered, the emotions flowing throw him, threatening to drown him. He had desired this for a long time, even when he couldn't understand the need or that it was just this what he wanted. The taste of the lips of the man he had rescued from Hell more than five years ago, was the most exquisite thing he had ever tasted. And their bodies pressed together... They had done it before, but normally it was only with anger, like when he rebelled for the first time, or when he cornered Dean for considering saying yes to Michael. This time it was about intimacy. Cas didn't know if this was something that only humans could have or not, but he knew that as long as he could have Dean's body pressed against him, and said man staring at him with eyes filled with love, he would not need anything else. This was his new Heaven.

With soft movements Dean carried him to the bed. When the mattress hit the back of Cas' legs, he fell onto it, but not alone, because the hunter guided his fall onto it, making it slow. They settled themselves without breaking eye contact for a second, too absorbed into each other's soul. Because Dean didn't believe for a second that angel's didn't have them. The man under him had had one all along, and that's to what he had fallen in love with all those years ago.

Kissing him again, Dean experimented a bit and pushed his hardening erection against the other one. A moan came out of Cas' lips, and Dean smiled, that was what he was waiting for. With slow hands the hunter started removing the trenchcoat, and then continued with the coat and tie.

Undressing Cas while lying on the bed was complicated, but this was about love so the necessary patience came by. After unbuttoning the shirt, he used a hand to caress the other man's chest, stopping by a nipple and giving him unique attention. Dean was getting off just by hearing the soft moans that left rather rushed from the otherwise controlled mouth of Cas.

And then the fallen angel became a bit impatient and tugged Dean's jacket, urging him to start getting naked. He had never felt the desire for a naked body against him and he wasn't sure he was fully understanding the feelings now. But some kind of instinct resided in what once has been Jimmy's body that guided him. And when Dean's chest was fully exposed, he finished removing his own shirt and dragged the other man down for a kiss, the friction of naked skin against naked skin proving to be overwhelming.

The erection trapped in his pants was becoming painful. Cas wasn't sure of how to proceed with it, he just knew that he needed Dean to make it all better. He whined when the hunter pushed together once more their clothed members. With knowing fingers, and taking pity on him, Dean got rid of the fallen angel's pants, shoes and socks off too. He didn't have the patience to deal with the boxers, so he just pushed them down, and took Cas' length in his hands earning a sharp moan from him. He jerked him off for a while, green eyes never leaving the blue ones. But Dean didn't want it to be just this, so he stopped. He finished taking off Cas' boxers, and proceeded to finish undressing himself.

Dean pushed his now naked members together once, making both of them groan, before heading to the drawer where he hoped to find some lube. When he did found it, he thought of thanking his brother for the choice of room, but pushed the thought aside quickly. Thinking of Sam while he had a very naked, sweaty and hot Castiel underneath him was not good.

He opened the lube with one hand and poured some in Cas' fingers. The fallen angel gave him a questioning look.

"You need to prepare me," he whispered to Cas' right ear.

"How?" panted the inexperienced man.

"Like this," he said kneeling with one leg at each side of Cas' in a very open position and taking the brunette coated hand pass his aching cock and between his ass cheeks.

"There," he said while Cas' started hesitatingly to put pressure on his entrance.

Without much warning, Cas entered his finger inside him. Dean winced at the burning and filling sensation.

"Sorry, Dean," he said scared and starting to draw back his finger.

"No, don't," stopped him Dean with a groan, "just give me time to get used."

Cas locked his eyes with him, and after some moments he started to move his finger inside Dean. The former angel watched as Dean face contorted with pleasure, some sweet giving in seated in his green eyes. When he was drawing back, searching for more friction with Cas' finger, Dean begged.

"Another one."

Cas complied happily, loving how the hunter felt under his touch, how it was him that made him moan and squirm.

"You need to start scissoring me," instructed him Dean between pants, "to get me ready for you," he finished licking Cas' jaw.

Cas squirmed in pleasure and did as Dean told him. Dean's moans kept getting higher, his face buried in the space between Cas' head and shoulder. Then, the former angel decided to add a third finger out of his own drive. The hunter gave a small shout of pleasure.

"Cas!" he screamed.

Castiel smirked, not bad for a virgin, huh? Then, Dean grabbed his hand and stopped him. He took again the lube and poured a generous amount in his hand and coated the fallen angel's length, making him moan with his deeper-than-it-should-be-possible voice. Locking his eyes together and using his hand to center Cas' shaft, Dean impaled himself with one swift movement.

Both men groaned hard. Dean panted while he tried to get adjusted to the intrusion, his eyes never leaving Cas'. When he thought himself ready, he tried moving a bit, casting up his hips and then smashing them down. Cas' eyes went wide at the sudden pleasure. He had never experienced something like this, and the fact that it was _his_ Dean making him feel like this made it all better, and right.

The hunter moved up and down slowly, wanting to savor each moment. The feeling of his angel filling him there was more perfect, more fitting than he could have ever dreamt of. They never stopped looking at each other's eyes, not even when the pleasure was becoming so much that it threatened to make them come. Blue eyes found themselves in green ones, and so did the green eyes in the blue ones. They gasped and moaned each other's name constantly as a prayer that was only for both of them to understand. And when Cas' cock hit a special place inside Dean, the hunter couldn't help but close his eyes at a scream of "Cas!".

At the sight of the beautiful face of his hunter contorted in pleasure, eyes shut tight trying to hold back all the emotions that overwhelmed him, Cas wanted more. He wished to have his Grace back so he could see once more the bright and beautiful soul of his Dean. So he sit up on the bed, pressing their chests together, while he caressed the side of the hunter's face, while Dean continued to move up and down. And Cas still wanted more, so grabbing hard at his human, he turned them around and pushed Dean against the bed without getting out of him.

Dean's eyes snapped open, but he relaxed once more when he looked at Cas. And he squirmed, and moaned, and shouted when the fallen angel started moving again, with a much faster pace that the one they've been having so far, and hit his prostate with every thrust. With Dean's hands burying into his hips in a way that will surely leave their mark the next day, Cas understood. He understood what Dean was giving to him, the one thing he hadn't trusted a single being with, the reason why his bisexuality had remained as a buried fact for so long. It was about a sweet surrender, a complete giving in and trusting the other person.

Because not even when Dean had had sex with women who took control he had giving in completely. There's something about the act of penetration that always means a giving in, so even when the women where the dom, they always gave in a bit, and Dean held back a little. Because it's an act of trust, letting someone penetrate you, letting the other person introduce something into you, it always leaves some control to the other person.

When Dean let Cas to take control while he penetrated him, he was giving in to Castiel completely. He was trusting him with everything he had, everything he was. That's why Dean had always held his bisexuality back, he couldn't trust anyone with that kind of surrender, because it means vulnerability and that's not the kind of thing you just give to anyone. Anyone that wasn't Cas. He had taken control at the beginning, to teach the fallen angel his way around sex. But now, with Cas fucking him hard against the mattress, that was how things were meant to be. And all the fucked up things in Dean's life took their right perspective and everything was fine and right.

Cas understood what a magnificent gift Dean was giving him. He understood that the hunter wasn't giving him this despite he was human, or because of it. He was giving him this because it was something entitled only to him. Something that was exclusive property of Castiel, everything else, like his Grace, didn't matter. Those things were complements or not that didn't make Castiel into who he was. Because those things hadn't earned Dean's gift, that had been Castiel alone. That was what Castiel, what Cas meant, having Dean's sweet surrender.

"Dean," he screamed, overwhelmed by the emotions that flowed through him, the love and the passion.

Dean didn't knew if what he had to give would mean any difference for the fallen angel. If that would help him to not turn in that broken version he had once met. But it was all he had to give, so he would give it willingly. Cas' continuous assault to his prostate, and his smell, his warmth, his deep voice saying over and over again his name, were driving Dean to the edge. Holding to dear life to the naked body of his soulmate pressed to his, he came hard between their stomachs, shouting the angel's name for the whole motel to hear it.

And that was what made it for Cas too, the sudden pressure to his cock plus the already there feeling of Dean everywhere around him was to much. And shouting Dean's name in a startled cry that brought tears to Cas' eyes, he came.

The feel of Cas' semen against his prostate intensified the remaining sensations of Dean's orgasm. And when the fallen angel was able to open his eyes again, Dean smiled. For the first time, in years he was completely happy. Taking away a sweaty lock of hair from Cas forehead, he brought him down and kissed him. It was soft and deep.

Cas stared at those green eyes, while he removed himself from the other one, what earned him a small whine, and without taking away his stare he laid at his side. He was smiling too, a soft smile that on Cas said so much more.

"Cas, I..." began to say Dean, but he couldn't bring himself to finish it. He was afraid that if he said it out load, someone or something would take Cas away from him.

"Me too," said Cas, because now he understood.

With his arms around the other's waist and his legs tangled together, Dean drifted off to the land of sleep, where it was all skin, and moans and blue eyes that looked at him with love. Cas stared at him for a while before falling asleep. Maybe being a human wasn't so bad after all. He thought of the possibility of growing old along his Dean, and he liked it. He missed the strong warm bright of Dean's soul, but having the hunter so close to him, and as long as those green eyes kept looking at him so filled with love, it was almost as he could still see his soul. Metatron could keep his Grace provided that he kept his Dean.

With a smile still lingering in his face, Cas fell asleep too.

.

The next morning Dean woke with a pleasant sensation in his chest. When he tried to move he noticed that his ass was sore and that he was being held tightly by a pair of arms and legs. He looked at his right, and he saw Cas' face, eyes close, still sleeping. But Dean's movements stirred him awake and he slowly opened his eyes.

"Good morning," greeted him Dean.

Cas didn't understand for a second, he thought that he was still in a dream. But then, the memories from the night came back to him, and he smiled.

"Hello, Dean."

Dean smiled back at him.

They both proceeded to get up slowly, kissing each other softly, and getting dressed with measured movements. It was as if they were both afraid that with the light of the day everything that had transcended in the night, had been nothing but a pleasant dream. And that now, they would have both to face the harsh reality where their feelings weren't corresponded.

But is when they're about to leave the room, that Dean had had enough, so he took Cas against the wall and kissed him passionately, as if he could challenge God into proving him that this wasn't real. But Cas' tongue against him, felt very real, as well as his hand gripping tight his hair and pulling a bit. With a groan, they came apart to breath. Dean started licking and sucking Cas' neck, but then a growl from his stomach remembered him how hungry he was and that they hadn't had breakfast yet.

"Dammit," he said with a half laugh, "if I could just eat you."

"That would be considered cannibalism," said Cas with the most monotone voice he could manage between pants, "unless you're referring in a metaphorical sense that implies sexual activities, in which case I would like very much for you to proceed."

Dean smiled, "As soon as we arrive the bunker I'll eat all that you want of you," he whispered lasciviously at Cas' ear.

Cas pushed his half hard cock against Dean.

"I hope that you intend to fulfill you promise," panted the fallen angel.

"Is that a threat?" asked the hunter with a smirk.

Cas grabbed Dean by his jacket and turned their positions, pushing the hunter against the wall, and positioning one of his leg between Dean's.

"Consider it an extortion," he whispered biting Dean's neck, "if you later want me to fuck you."

Dean groaned. Who knew that the socially awkward nerdy fallen angel who until last night had been a virgin could learn dirty talk so fast.

"Stop unless you intend to fuck me right now," said Dean feeling his cock harden.

Not it was Cas turn for his stomach to growl. After a last mind blowing kiss they came apart. And thinking images of Crowley in a bikini, Dean went with Cas to wake up his brother and take him to have breakfast. When he arrived at Sam's door, he was fairly collected.

"Sammy, wake up! Let's go and grab some breakfast!" he shouted knocking at the door.

Sam opened the door and received him with his hair a mess, and a sleepy look that said he had barely slept through the night.

"Wait a second," he said while he went to dress himself and splash some water on his face and hair, he was too tired to try to comb it, "You know," he began while he closed the motel room's door behind him, "although I'm very happy for you too, the walls... they're not soundproof," he finished putting the best bitch face that his sleepy state allowed him.

Dean blushed a little bit.

"I apologize for the disturbance to your sleep," said Cas.

Dean smiled at the typical response from Cas, even Sam smiled a bit.

"It's not that," he said, "just... keep me away from your sex life," and as he really didn't want to talk about it he went directly to the Impala.

Sam whined when Dean joined him in the car, and noticed how his brother had trouble sitting down. As if his ass was s... No. He definitely didn't want to go there.

They ate at Big Anderson's, where Dean overhead a bunch of Potterheads talking about a Harry Potter marathon that the local cinema was having thanks to the con. He remembered that he had promised Cas to make him watch the movies, so...

"Hey, Cas," he said feeling like a teenage girl asking the popular kid to go out with her, "I've been thinking... There's a Harry Potter marathon at the cinema... And I did say that you needed to watch the movies... So, I was wondering... if... if you would like to watch them with me..." he trailed off hating himself.

He had no problems about the other one fucking him hard into the mattress the last night, but now he was stuttering like an idiot. He hated himself sometimes -hated himself more than normal, that's it.

"Dean, are you asking me on a date?" asked Cas with a faint smile playing on his lips, but visible enough for the both Winchesters that knew him well.

"Well... If you want to see it that way," said Dean with a faint voice, he cleared his throat, "Yes," he finally said clearly.

"I'd love to watch the Harry Potter movies with you," answered Cas.

Sam didn't say anything and just smiled. He was truly happy for his brother and friend. He had not seen Dean this happy since... since ever practically. There was an air of satisfaction in his brother. Like if he could truly achieve happiness even with their crap of a life. And Cas, well, he might end liking humanity and he did consider the fallen angel family. So him being with Dean was just as reassuring the bond. Suddenly, he missed Bobby. He wondered what he would say to them. Probably, something along the lines of "It took you some bloody time, idjits," Sam smiled to himself. He knew that Bobby cared for Cas too. And he knew how supportive he would be of him with his new humanity. Bobby would have been as much of a father to Cas, who also run on the absent Father path, as he has been to him. Sam wondered if he knew what Metatron had done, and if he was giving him hell for it. "You could bet your sorry ass that I'm giving him hell. Do you think I'm some weakling old man that can't defend his cubs?" Sam laughed at Bobby's representation in his head.

"What are you laughing at?" asked him Dean.

"I'm just imagining what Bobby would say if he saw us here," answered him Sam with a nostalgic smile.

Dean gave him a sympathetic look. He also wanted for Bobby to be there with them. He always knew how he had wanted for him to come out of the closet. He had never said it out load, but it was more than an understanding. Bobby just wanted for Dean to accept himself and to be happy. Well, he was happy now, he thought looking at Cas.

"Yeah, I miss him too," he sighed.

"He was a great man," commented Cas, and that was his way of letting them know that he wanted him there with them too.

Dean looked around him. He stared at his brother, who was getting better everyday, and who despite the whole thing with Amelia has always been there. He then stared at Cas, his new lover, or boyfriend, or whatever, who he loved as much as his brother although in a totally different way, who complemented him in a way no other could. Yeah, Hell may still be open and his way of living may still suck, but maybe it was worthy. Dean realized for the first time that he belonged, and that if Sam ever decided to move on again, he would still have someone to come home to.

Dean thought of all the times Bobby had told him to just be happy, in one way or another. And now he'd be able to look at his father of the heart in the eyes and give him a straight answer.

Dean Winchester was happy.

.

Thanks to the big amount of nerds that were at the town, the eldest hunter had had to go to get tickets for the Harry Potter marathon as soon as they finished breakfast. He had to stay in line all morning to buy the tickets, and then, he had to wait in line to enter the cinema and get good seats. They had agreed with Cas to meet at midday, half an hour before the first screening. There were still five minutes left for the accorded time, and Dean was starting to get nervous. He felt stupid for it, but he couldn't help it.

He was somehow afraid that Cas wouldn't come. He said he wanted to go back to the motel and get properly changed for the date. So, here was Dean, checking his watch every five seconds, nervous as if this was his first date ever. At exactly, the arranged time, Cas appeared. He was wearing his trenchcoat as always, with the new suit that they had bought together and the tie that Dean had gift him with. Later, Cas said that this clothes had a special meaning for him. The suit was an acceptance of his humanity, and the tie was the first time he saw a good side to being human.

"You came," said Dean with a smile, as if the angel would have back down on him.

"We had an appointment," he answered with a monotone voice that held a hidden smile.

Dean smiled. Because it was more than an inside joke. It was about what Dean had said to Cas when he returned from the future that Zachariah had sent him too. It meant that Cas understood what Dean had meant back then with the "Don't ever change." It was a promise, Cas was promising him that he wouldn't turn into that version of himself that Dean was disgusted with. It meant that he would try to be happy. And the smile that Cas gave him meant that he was happy now.

.

They managed to watch through halfway of the third movie. Not that Cas wasn't interested in the plot of anything like that, but not too much into the Prisoner of Azkaban, they had started kissing and things started to heathen up. It all started when Dean had put his hand on Cas' leg, and then started moving it up, stopping close to the fallen angel's crotch. Next thing, they had to leave the cinema walking awkwardly and they rushed to the back seat of the Impala. Kissing was not enough, so they started taking out their clothes as fast as they could in the small place of the car. Dean didn't need much preparation thanks to the activities of that night and good old Cas had been smart enough as to take with him the lube from the motel. The sex was rough, Cas was a fast learner so in no time he had Dean moaning and shouting under him. The hunter didn't know if it was because being a bottom rocked, or if it was because it was Cas fucking his brains out or if it was both, but it didn't take him long to come. The fallen angel came with him when he felt Dean's ass squeezing his cock, milking him out.

Once their breaths had slowed down and they were once more fully clothed, they went to the motel to pick up their stuff and Sam, and head back to the bunker. It didn't take them long, and Sam was already packed. According to Dean, Cas had earned his right to travel in the passenger seat. Sam didn't argue as he had a guess as to were the discussion could be headed.

He had closed the door and was accommodating himself in the backseat when he sniffed something.

"Why does it smell as s...?" but then he brain did the math, and he face contorted into a mix of a bitch face and a disgusted expression, "Oh, man, really? In here? When I have to travel here?" he complained opening the window and sat using as little surface as possible, which was a hard task considering his size.

Dean smiled. Finally being with Cas was awesome, but if he managed to mess around with his little brother. Well, that was a great added bonus.

Sam sighed. It was going to be a long five hour journey back to the bunker.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I could have ended the story here because what's better than awkward!Sam, but I decided it needed more Destiel. So one more chapter to go.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys like this story. Thank you for reading. If feels sad to bring this story to an end, as it helped me to deal with post-season 8 feels a lot. I think I never felt for Supernatural and Destiel as I felt for any other fandom or OTP, and I do have a fair share of fandoms and OTPs... Anyway, I feel bitter-sweetand thank you for reading this, now go and enjoy the last arc of the story/Epilogue...

The day that on Earth was known as the day were thousands of three months old babies died, was also the day were Sam and Dean Winchester, along Castiel, died too.

They had found a counter spell, a spell that would return all the angels to Heaven. The first ingredient had been easy to obtain, it was the mix product of the love between a human and a fallen angel. Cas and Dean were more than happy to provide it. They had jerked off each other and then collected their semen into a flask. Sam preferred not to think much of that ingredient. The second ingredient was easy too, it was the blood of an angel who had lost his Grace. So it had been easy for Cas, to bleed into another flask.

The third ingredient was the complicated one. They needed the Grace of the angel that had made the spell, plus the spell needed to be done in Heaven. And Metatron was not leaving Heaven so there was only one thing left to be done. It couldn't be suicide, or they wouldn't get to go to Heaven. They had to be killed.

After reasoning, and arguing with Kevin, who argued he had done enough with translating the spell for them, he agreed to kill them. A shot to the forehead they decided. It would be fast and swift. The hard past was to decide in what order he should kill them. All of them wanted to be first, neither wanted to watch the other two die. The other big question is who was going to be last, who had to stand alone at the end.

At the end, Sam decided to go last. He knew that either to Dean or Cas it would be too much to watch his lover die, it would be already too much to force them to see him die too. Then Cas argued he had to go first, he knew Heaven and he would be more prepared to face whatever they found.

So when it was all set they sat against a wall of the bunker. Kevin was nervous, the Winchester and the fallen angel weren't his favorite people, but they were almost all he got considering how everyone in his life had ended up dead thanks to Crowley. He sighed and pointed his gun to Cas, who had already said the spell that would help him to carry the flasks to Heaven despite being in a spirit form. The fallen angel faced it bravely, hidden any signs of fear. Steadying his hand and uttering no word, he didn't trust himself to speak, Kevin shot. The bullet went directly through Cas head, his blue eyes were emptied from all life immediately.

Dean suppressed a cry, only the comfort of knowing he was next gave him strength. If Kevin didn't kill him, he would do it himself. The prophet pointed the gun to him next and shot.

When it was Sam's turn, his eyes were filled with tears. The shot came as a relief.

Kevin's orders where to wait twenty four hours, and if that time they didn't miraculously revive, he was to burn their bodies in a hunter's funeral. The prophet looked at the time in his watch, and waited.

.

"Tessa," said Dean when he saw his reaper.

"Dean," she said, and then looked around watching as Kevin pointed his gun at Sam, "of all the stupid things..."

"Well, you know me, if it isn't crazy or suicidal it isn't me," he answered.

"So," sighed Tessa, "are you going to put a fight this time or are you going to just come with me?"

"No, I'll go with you," he said, not wanting to watch how Sam died.

"Come then," she said offering a hand.

Dean took it and walked a bit with her. A white light enveloped him and next, he woke up in the back sit of his Impala. A pleasant sensation in his groin made him look down, Cas was sucking him. Dean lost himself in the moment before remembering that this wasn't his Cas, this was just an echo, a memory replayed by Heaven. He remembered the occasion. They have finished a hunt faster than expected, and they had thirty minutes before Sam showed up. So they decided to make the best of it. Cas' tongue swirled around his cock while his mouth went up and down. Dean was about to come shamefully fast, as he had done so that time. He was fighting against the instinct to just let go, when a knock on the window distract him.

"I see you are busy," said a deep voice.

"Cas!" exclaimed Dean untangling himself from the fake Cas, and putting back his cock in his pants -surprisingly soft once he disregarded the memory, "How did you find me so fast? Are our Heavens together?"

"Now that I am human, it seems so," Cas answered giving him one of his soul stares.

They both knew the meaning behind it. They were soulmates.

"Sam should be coming soon," added Cas, the fact that Dean also shared his slice of Heaven with Sam was no hidden fact. However it arose no jealousy from the former angel, it had always been common knowledge in Heaven that there were more than just one type of soulmate. And although soulmates weren't all that usual, and people with more than one soulmate were even rarer, it wasn't _unnatural_ either. And for Cas it was more than natural, they were family, and if he had learned something from the Winchesters it was the meaning of family. Sam was his family and it felt logical that they shared that piece of Heaven that belonged to Dean.

Sam arrived with his breath out.

"That was some long road," he said.

"So how do we found that feathered son of a bitch then?" asked Dean.

"Metatron will find us eventually, he'll sense our presence in Heaven," explained Cas, "We just need him to find us in an advantageous setting to trap him."

"But he will be expecting a trap," argued Dean, "he'll probably find a way to screw with it and make it goes against us."

"That's why we need to think double," reasoned the fallen angel.

They begun going road after road, happy memory after happy memory, while they elaborated a plan. They were fast, never staying much into any memory, else Metatron would find them before they were ready.

"Buenos días, mis amigos!" cheered a voice behind them when they were into one of Cas memories, it was a simple one, of the three of them having dinner at the bunker.

The three members of Team Free Will turned around, and saw Ash walking towards them.

"You guys really need to stop dying," he claimed.

"Of all the stupid ideas, you idjits. What the hell were you thinking?" complained Bobby walking behind Ash.

"Bobby!" shouted at unison the brothers, running towards his adopted father and hugging him.

"Yeah, yeah, I wish I was that happy to see you guys here," he said but hugged them back nevertheless, "And you too," he said pointing his chin to Cas who was wearing one of his soft smiles.

"So I guess you know what we're doing here, right?" asked Sam.

"Yeah, to kick the ass of that feathered popsicle," said Bobby, "Now, how you guys, are planning to do that, I don't have a friggin' idea."

"We have a plan," informed Cas.

"Okay, guys, that's great, but why don't you guys say that while we keep moving. We have only one angel that has all the mojo of Heaven to himself, and he isn't fond of you," said Ash.

.

"It was easy knowing something big had happened," explained Ash sitting at the bar of his own heaven, "From hearing thousands of angels speaking to just hear one. Then the _loco_ started narrating the story to himself, and of course _your_ names appeared on it. Tell me, is there ever something apocalyptic in which you guys don't have your hands buried into deep shit?"

Dean and Sam moved uncomfortable in their sits.

"No," answered Cas for them, "they whole families were involved in great events. It runs in the genes."

Dean gave Cas a harsh look.

"It is a fact," defended himself the fallen angel.

Dean stared at him for a while more.

"And by the way, the phrase is 'it runs in the blood' not genes."

"But it is the genes that are shared generation through generation. Blood it is not even shared in the female's womb. It is genetics not blood what links families together," explained Cas.

"You know what, never mind," said Dean with a sigh of fake resignation.

Even after a year of living as a human, Cas still missed the point of many things of humanity. And Dean loved him for that.

Bobby whispered something that went along the lines of "bloody pair of idjits in love," under his breath, even tough he loved to the bloody core said pair of idjits.

"Do you know if this cursed plan of yours will work?" he asked to the three of them.

"No," answered Sam in all honesty.

"But it is all we got," admitted Dean.

"And we need to do it," finished Cas.

Bobby gave a big sip to his beer. He couldn't have adopted a stupider trio of morons.

"If we weren't already dead, this bloody plans of yours will kill us. But, dammit, of course I will help you, you idjits."

.

"Come on, we need to hurry," said Sam checking the notebook that Ash had gave them to check how far away from them Metatron was.

They were currently back into their own Heaven. This was a memory from Dean. He was thirteen years old and he was with Sam at Bobby's care. He had taken them into an abandoned house, and he had gave them some spray-paint can. The original idea was for Bobby to teach them how to do demon traps with them, on John's orders. But they had got carried away and they were doing doodles on the walls. The older man had said nothing to them, and laughed at their designs.

"Come on," said Dean taking the spray-paint cans with him.

The three men hurried themselves, until they found the road again. They ran until they appeared in another memory, this was Cas'. It belonged from the time were he was still an angel and Team Free Will had arisen recently.

Both, he and Dean were there, memory Dean spoke.

"Let me tell you something. There are two things I know for certain. One, Bert and Ernie are gay. Two, you are not gonna die a virgin. Not on my watch. Let's go."

They didn't follow memory Dean and Cas when they left.

"So this it," said Sam totally ignoring what he had heard, "we don't have time to find the road again."

"Let's do it," claimed Dean.

He passed the spray-paint cans that he had taken from the last memory, one to Sam and another one to Cas. The three of them painted angel sigils on all the walls save on one, the one that had the door. That one was left so Metatron would be able to come in. Once he did they planned on painting that wall too and trapping the angel in the room. The men waited in silence. This was it. The door of the motel room trembled, and then snapped open.

"Hello, boys," greeted them Metatron.

Dean didn't waste any time and headed for the wall with the can ready in his hand. With a simple gesture, the hunter flew across the room and landed against the opposite wall.

"You disappoint me, guys," he said, a simple gesture and the cans were gone, "I have all the power of Heaven with me. If you wanted to defeat me, you should have tried harder," another gesture and a crack appeared in each one of the sigils.

With a glance from Metatron, Sam and Cas were pressed against the wall with an invisible force, at Dean's side.

"Especially you, Castiel, I was hoping that you would live a long life so could told me a good story when you came here. Instead, you come to me with this," he said pointing at Dean and Sam, "and only after a year. What good story can you tell me that just happens in so little time."

Cas said nothing and just stared at him unable to move. If stares could kill angels, then Metatron would have fallen dead.

"Oh, no, I know, that are many good stories that happen in less than a year time. But those need good characters, and I can't say that for those two there."

"That's where you're wrong," panted Dean still half lying on the floor, torso and head glued to the wall, "we do have a good story."

"And hundreds of characters," added Sam.

The walls of the motel room crumbled down with the power of a thousand souls and white blueish light surround them. When the bright came down enough and so they could see each other again Metatron's face was startled.

"What in the name of...?"

"You know for a guys who likes to read you should have read the Supernatural books," said Dean, a twisted smile in his face.

"You should know that sooner or later, we always defeat the bad guy," added Sam.

Around them there were hundreds and hundreds of persons. The good thing about all your friends dying is that it means a lot of contacts in Heaven. And those contacts have contacts of their own. So when you add the power of a thousand souls and each one of them have a different sigil craved on their chest, there's no angel than can resist. And Metatron was no exception, not even with all the power of Heaven for him. There were all there, not only Ash and Bobby. But Ellen, and Jo, and their mother. And it was Andy and Sarah, and all those to who they had did the best to protect but failed.

Metatron was frozen in his spot unable to move.

"I have a story to tell you," told him Cas going towards him, angel blade on his hand, the angel's grip on him had disappeared after the presence of the sigils.

He put the blade against Metatron's neck, his body close to the other's, lips near the angel's ear.

"It begun six years ago, when I received the order to rescue the Righteous Man from Hell," Cas whispered burying the blade a bit into Metatron's neck, "I fell in love with him, and he with me. And I just kept falling for him over and over again," with each sentence Cas buried the blade a bit more into the other's neck, "But we wouldn't say anything to each other and be both made our share of mistakes. Until one day someone stole my Grace. And when I felt lost, he rescued me and I found true happiness with him. So, thank you," he said separating himself from Metatron and taking an empty flask from his coat.

He put the flask next to the angel's neck, and enchanting some words in Enochian, he collected Metatron's Grace.

"And in my story," he said out load, "the villain dies."

Without his Grace to heal himself, and no angel left that could heal him, Metatron bleed to death from the cut in his neck. No burnt of wings accompanied his death, and no one ever saw Metatron in Heaven again.

The souls gathered together in that spot of Heaven started to disperse. Many of them have only come out of duty, to do what was right, specially those who didn't knew the two brothers. Others, the ones of those who had know what was to be saved by the two Winchesters, no matter that they had died anyway, lingered a bit more, making sure that everything was all right, but left soon. At the end, the only ones left were those who composed the weird family of the Winchesters. Their mother and Bobby, Ellen and Jo, even Ash that was like the weird little brother that no one wanted around but that everyone loved.

"It's time to do the spell," said Cas.

They mixed the three flask in a bowl that Bobby had brought from one of his memories and they put it in the middle. They gathered around it, while Cas enchanted the words. The ground shook, a yellow light emanated from the ground and big explosions were heard all around Heaven.  
On Earth, thousands of three months old babies died. They were angels returning to Heaven.  
On Heaven some souls exploded in balls of lights, they were the angels who had died on Earth, the ones who had been aborted before being born or those who had just died as little babies.

And then, there was silence. Nothing else was left to be done. Dean walked to Metatron's body and kneeled beside it. He searched for something between his clothes, and when he found it, he sighed heavily. He went to Cas, and extended his hand.

"This belongs to you," he said, from his hand hanged a necklace, Cas' Grace was attached to it.

Dean was waiting for Cas to take it, it had been great sharing a year with Cas as human, but he always knew that the angel was too good for him. He didn't deserved him, he had borrowed him for a whole year, but now it was over. Cas took his Grace with shaking hands and looked at it, eyes open in wonder. He had missed it. He felt the familiar warmth in his hands, and smiled. But then his eyes rose to the human standing next to him, that looked at him with eyes filled with tears that he would deny if given the chance. Because Dean was willing to let him go. And so, Cas was willing to let go of his Grace.

"Thank you," he said, "but I don't want it," and he motioned Dean to grab it again.

"But... But that's your Grace," stuttered Dean, "You'll be an angel again," he said as if Cas couldn't see what was obvious.

"I know," Cas said, "and that's why I don't want it."

He gave a step forward towards Dean, and hanged his Grace around the hunter's neck.

"I want to be human with you, Dean. I want to grow old with you and when we die, I want to share Heaven with you."

"Cas, I..." said Dean, lost into the other's blue eyes.

"I love you, Dean," confessed Cas.

And Dean couldn't contain himself anymore and kissed the man in front of him. He trowed his arms around Cas' neck and kissed him passionately.

Around them, their family smiled.

Mary was the one whose smile was the brightest, happy to see her children happy. She hugged Cas as one of her own.

.

They have been waiting for one of the angels to appear. Maybe one of them would be grateful enough as to send them back to Earth, and if not they had a Heaven to share. Their families had returned to their respective heavens, when a black man appeared. His hair was white and his eyes looked peaceful.

"I've been looking for you," he said when he was in front of the Winchesters and Cas who stared at him, expecting him to continue, "I forgot that you can't recognize me now, forgive me," he said to Cas, "I'm Joshua."

Cas' eyes widened, fear appear in them.

"Yes," said Joshua with the same calm voice, "Father is speaking to me again. And he knows of everything you've done."

Cas had never experienced such fear before. His hands were trembling while he waited for God's judgment.

"He wants me to tell you that he's proud of you," continued Joshua with his calm voice.

Cas' eyes widened in disbelief.

Joshua smiled, "He is. You did wrong but you also did right. And today, you mended every one of your mistakes. He wants you to enjoy your reward."

"I don't understand," said Cas.

"Castiel, you did what he asked of us. You love humanity more than you love Him. You fell in love with a human. You rebelled against Heaven for him," Joshua sighed, "Castiel, don't you understand. Father created us for obedience, and planned us for disobedience."

In Cas' eyes there was hope and relief. Could it be possible? Could it be that he had done some things right? That all the sins he had made were washed away just like that?

"Go, enjoy your reward," said Joshua and put two fingers in his forehead.

.

Cas gasped, coming back to life. At his side, he heard Sam and Dean gasp too. He laid against the wall for a while, evening his breath. But Kevin's shouts didn't let him stay quiet for long.

"For God's sake! You scared the hell out of me!" he was cursing, mostly to hide his relief.

"Yeah, well, next time we come back from the dead will give you a call first," said Dean.

"Knowing our luck, there'll be a next time probably," complained Sam getting up from the floor.

"Cas, you all right?" asked Dean, as the fallen angel hadn't uttered a word.

But Cas didn't answer, just kept staring in front of him.

"Cas!" shouted Dean, rushing to his side, "Cas, speak to me!" he said shaking the man by his shoulders.

The contact seemed to take out Cas from his stupor.

"Yes, sorry," he said, "I just..." he trailed off, unable to find the words to express his shock, "I can't believe it."

"Well, sometimes good things do happen, or so someone told me once," said Dean smiling, "Come on, let's go."

They went to the kitchen were they snacked some food as dinner with Sam and Kevin. Tomorrow they would wash the blood from the wall. Today they would rest.

Dean and Cas went to their room. It was the one that has been Dean's, but now it was _theirs_. They started kissing each other as soon as the door was close. And when Dean attempted to take out his shirt, he discovered the necklace with Cas' Grace hanging under it. He looked at it with awe, and a certain trace of fear, as if he feared that Cas would back down, reclaim his Grace and leave him.

Cas took his chin and forced him to look at him in the eye. Green eyes locking with blue ones.

"I gave it to you, and I don't regret it," he said, "It's yours."

And that night when they made love, there was a sense of closure. All the doubts, all the fears had been laid aside. They knew that they truly belonged to each other. And when he saw Dean come under him, his Grace still around his neck, he thought that maybe he had judged his Father wrongly.  
And after he came too, and was getting asleep hugged to Dean's naked form against him, he thought that maybe his Father did had a greater plan for all of them. A plan that none of them truly knew. And maybe, that plan wasn't so bad.

"Thank you, Father," was his last thought before he trailed off into sleep.

.

.

.

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THE END

_"No doubt- endings are hard. But then again... nothing ever really ends, does it?"  
_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It feels weird to give a happy ending to a story, specially a fanfic, when usually they all end dead in my stories. But I guess that just speaks of how much our babies have suffered in canon, right?
> 
> Thank you for reading.

**Author's Note:**

> First I hope you caught the small methaphor that I put on it. Second and most important I hope you enjoyed it, and that you want to read the next chapter.


End file.
